Linsang cpr
This happens when I was around 10/11 years of age.
After break fast (berbuka puasa) at the mosque (masjid) there is always gap time while waiting for isya’ and tarawikh. Despite the darkness of the night we all go cycling around the vicinity to kill the time because when you’re kids you always have lots of time to kill.
When we are almost passing the evening religious school (sekolah arab) here comes a car from a different direction, fast. All of a sudden we hear a loud thump but the car just pass us fast never even sounds like intending to stop.
An otter (memerang/linsang) just got hit by the car. It is lying at the side of the road and we all go to check up on it.
It is dying, lying on its side and having difficulties breathing. I should be using better phrase than just having difficulties breathing but sometimes words just don’t come out right. And your heart would skip a beat too. Wow. Everything is in slow motion. You think this world suddenly is filled with a bed of roses and it’s all beautiful and everything and suddenly I realise I’m not writing the time when I bump into the girl I fancy so much in the world, I’m writing how to do cpr to an otter. Wow.
Okay.
I dunno if the otter’s heart is skipping a beat as if he sees his missus but I’m pretty sure it is slowing down bit by bit and if nobody is saving him this will be the end of him I said we should take him to the towns to the vet in Bagan datoh. If we do it in time we might save him, it’s already dark or not.
But nobody really actually fancy doing it for their own cat, let alone a wild otter. Animals die everyday on this road, and they will not always be remembered. In fact, they probably won’t if you never have any emotional attachment to them. Lizards, chicken, dogs, cats, and the lots. This is the reality of life, man.
Well, with great power comes great responsibility. I have only known this world for so many years, it is a bit early, yes, but I guess the time has come for me to step up.
Stand back, I said. I wanna do cpr.
So they open up to let me tend to the sick animal. Because an otter is a small creature, compared to, say, a cow, I think I should just do a baby cpr like they do in tv- just push the ribs using a hand instead of pushing them hard using both hands. 1, 2, 3, I push the otter’s ribs. Then I put my ears to the ribs and yes, there is still heartbeat.
My friends all think I am crazy.
Then I do it again. 1, 2, 3. Suddenly the otter started to breath in longer stretches. I dunno if that means I’m getting him better or worse but at least there has some changes in him. Then Airine would take over from me. Stand back, lemme do it now. 1, 2, 3, Airine pushes the otter’s ribs. All of a sudden from the mouth of the otter start coming out bubbles and saliva. Wth. We all start panicking. I know what we haven’t done yet, mouth-to-mouth. You do it while I do the 1, 2, 3. No, you do it. Are you crazy. I’m not goona do a mouth-to-mouth to an otter. Look at the saliva hanging from its mouth. Then how are we goona save him. I dunno, you do the mouth-to-mouth. I would rather do it to a guava (jambu batu) rather than to an otter’s mouth with saliva hanging. So what are we goona do now. We goona lose him.
While we were fighting the otter slowly loses its breath and we know it’s no longer in our hands. Figuratively, and literally because the otter smells of mud too. We don’t fancy eating the dessert after terawikh (more) with hands smells otter and mud.
We all walk away from a creature of God’s and continued cycling. When I cycle the same road the next day the otter is no longer there. I want to hope that it has gotten on its feet because of our cpr, but that is just impossible. Probably some poachers passing by see it and grab it for illegal money in the black market. I dunno what an otter has of medicinal value but it seems like every kind of animals can be sold, at least that’s what I think when I see majalah tiga in tv3.
This has been the story how I’ve lost my first and only patient. I’ve got a 100% black record in medical practice. From this and a couple more incidents in my life I decided I am not fit to become a medical doctor to save people’s lives. Not to mention I don’t exactly have the appropriate personality. What is the use of big money if I can’t be nice and gentle to patients who are already have dark clouds in their heads because they have to leave work, kids, friends, and possibly business partners especially if they are rich businessmen with big belly who think that every disease can be cured if you have the right money. Even if I tell them prevention is better than cure man so start living healthy lifestyle man do you not love your family man if you don’t then just think of yourself then man because it is for your own sake, they would still eat a lot, not go exercise, not to mention not go to the pitch for footie and all they know is to curse the professional football players on telly and lament on Malaysia not making it to the world cup when they never kick a ball, let alone know that to develop a world class player is not as easy as eating a peanut (bukan senang macam makan kacang). I might get so upset with them not caring about themselves and then they might come again to see me for medicine and here’s the money, gimme the right medicine, I might just yell at them get outta here, I don’t wanna see anybody who doesn’t love himself. Why himself not with herself to be gender neutral. Because it is usually men who are businessmen with protruding bellies with bad lifestyle, and I wonder why celebrities always want to marry them when there are always chance to marry a bright young scientist, a bit pimply in the face department, yes, but he works hard to keep his bellies from protruding with sit ups, and he plays central midfield, the most demanding of all position on the pitch ha ha.
I finally decided if I become a scientist I might save more people, contribute the mankind in the long run, write my own articles in world-class journals, and with hard work and luck, I might ultimately find worldwide fame. Ha ha ha.
And if I do get a chance for an interview I might tell them the story of my linsang cpr ha ha.
After break fast (berbuka puasa) at the mosque (masjid) there is always gap time while waiting for isya’ and tarawikh. Despite the darkness of the night we all go cycling around the vicinity to kill the time because when you’re kids you always have lots of time to kill.
When we are almost passing the evening religious school (sekolah arab) here comes a car from a different direction, fast. All of a sudden we hear a loud thump but the car just pass us fast never even sounds like intending to stop.
An otter (memerang/linsang) just got hit by the car. It is lying at the side of the road and we all go to check up on it.
It is dying, lying on its side and having difficulties breathing. I should be using better phrase than just having difficulties breathing but sometimes words just don’t come out right. And your heart would skip a beat too. Wow. Everything is in slow motion. You think this world suddenly is filled with a bed of roses and it’s all beautiful and everything and suddenly I realise I’m not writing the time when I bump into the girl I fancy so much in the world, I’m writing how to do cpr to an otter. Wow.
Okay.
I dunno if the otter’s heart is skipping a beat as if he sees his missus but I’m pretty sure it is slowing down bit by bit and if nobody is saving him this will be the end of him I said we should take him to the towns to the vet in Bagan datoh. If we do it in time we might save him, it’s already dark or not.
But nobody really actually fancy doing it for their own cat, let alone a wild otter. Animals die everyday on this road, and they will not always be remembered. In fact, they probably won’t if you never have any emotional attachment to them. Lizards, chicken, dogs, cats, and the lots. This is the reality of life, man.
Well, with great power comes great responsibility. I have only known this world for so many years, it is a bit early, yes, but I guess the time has come for me to step up.
Stand back, I said. I wanna do cpr.
So they open up to let me tend to the sick animal. Because an otter is a small creature, compared to, say, a cow, I think I should just do a baby cpr like they do in tv- just push the ribs using a hand instead of pushing them hard using both hands. 1, 2, 3, I push the otter’s ribs. Then I put my ears to the ribs and yes, there is still heartbeat.
My friends all think I am crazy.
Then I do it again. 1, 2, 3. Suddenly the otter started to breath in longer stretches. I dunno if that means I’m getting him better or worse but at least there has some changes in him. Then Airine would take over from me. Stand back, lemme do it now. 1, 2, 3, Airine pushes the otter’s ribs. All of a sudden from the mouth of the otter start coming out bubbles and saliva. Wth. We all start panicking. I know what we haven’t done yet, mouth-to-mouth. You do it while I do the 1, 2, 3. No, you do it. Are you crazy. I’m not goona do a mouth-to-mouth to an otter. Look at the saliva hanging from its mouth. Then how are we goona save him. I dunno, you do the mouth-to-mouth. I would rather do it to a guava (jambu batu) rather than to an otter’s mouth with saliva hanging. So what are we goona do now. We goona lose him.
While we were fighting the otter slowly loses its breath and we know it’s no longer in our hands. Figuratively, and literally because the otter smells of mud too. We don’t fancy eating the dessert after terawikh (more) with hands smells otter and mud.
We all walk away from a creature of God’s and continued cycling. When I cycle the same road the next day the otter is no longer there. I want to hope that it has gotten on its feet because of our cpr, but that is just impossible. Probably some poachers passing by see it and grab it for illegal money in the black market. I dunno what an otter has of medicinal value but it seems like every kind of animals can be sold, at least that’s what I think when I see majalah tiga in tv3.
This has been the story how I’ve lost my first and only patient. I’ve got a 100% black record in medical practice. From this and a couple more incidents in my life I decided I am not fit to become a medical doctor to save people’s lives. Not to mention I don’t exactly have the appropriate personality. What is the use of big money if I can’t be nice and gentle to patients who are already have dark clouds in their heads because they have to leave work, kids, friends, and possibly business partners especially if they are rich businessmen with big belly who think that every disease can be cured if you have the right money. Even if I tell them prevention is better than cure man so start living healthy lifestyle man do you not love your family man if you don’t then just think of yourself then man because it is for your own sake, they would still eat a lot, not go exercise, not to mention not go to the pitch for footie and all they know is to curse the professional football players on telly and lament on Malaysia not making it to the world cup when they never kick a ball, let alone know that to develop a world class player is not as easy as eating a peanut (bukan senang macam makan kacang). I might get so upset with them not caring about themselves and then they might come again to see me for medicine and here’s the money, gimme the right medicine, I might just yell at them get outta here, I don’t wanna see anybody who doesn’t love himself. Why himself not with herself to be gender neutral. Because it is usually men who are businessmen with protruding bellies with bad lifestyle, and I wonder why celebrities always want to marry them when there are always chance to marry a bright young scientist, a bit pimply in the face department, yes, but he works hard to keep his bellies from protruding with sit ups, and he plays central midfield, the most demanding of all position on the pitch ha ha.
I finally decided if I become a scientist I might save more people, contribute the mankind in the long run, write my own articles in world-class journals, and with hard work and luck, I might ultimately find worldwide fame. Ha ha ha.
And if I do get a chance for an interview I might tell them the story of my linsang cpr ha ha.
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